So after seven years of marriage, Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony have decided to end their marriage. Irreconcilable differences, no doubt. Maybe the Hollywood sect hasn't heard that marriage is tough. It takes work, devotion, and commitment. Why is it so easy for people to end a marriage? Should it be easier to get out of a marriage than it is a car lease? Surely not!
My husband and I have been married for almost 20 years. While I'd love to tell you it's been easy, that would be a lie. Marriage is hard work. Then you throw kids into the mix, and things get even trickier. But if we had gone into this marriage covenant with the belief that if things get too difficult, we could always just walk away-- then I suppose we might have opted-out many times before now. But, we both knew that this was a life commitment, and because of that, we decided to work through some hard times rather than packing our bags and calling it quits.
Before we got married, my then-boyfriend and I discussed the two "unforgivable sins". These are not necessarily Biblical, but for us these were the two issues that we might have had trouble working through and healing from. They were: Infidelity, and physical abuse (of each other or our children). We decided we could work through anything else, and unless we were faced with the Big Two, we never had a reason to use the "D" word. This included money issues and family on one side who (believe it or not) actually desired to break us up. We weathered some big storms, and because of that we are no longer shiny and new like in the dating years, but stronger and much more resilient.
I'm grateful that I married my husband almost 20 years ago. He still has the one set of arms in which I feel the absolute safest. He loves me in a way that I know is real and complete. Yes, we drive each other crazy at times. Yes, like most couples, we argue over somewhat silly stuff. (Yes, he does realize I'm mostly right--which alone makes him a keeper!) But seriously... we have decided to remain together. In good times and in bad. In sickness and in health. We've had all four of those during the last 20 years!!
While I didn't say the words, "OBEY" in my vows, I DO love him more today than I did all those years ago standing in front of our friends and family vowing to love him 'til death do us part. Hmmm...wait. "Deeper" might be the more accurate word. Yes, over the years we've just learned to love more deeply. In spite of our weaknesses, faults, and excessive baggage we still choose each other. Most days. (Hey, I had to add a little humor to the end...)